The Biggest Trend This Summer: Self-Confidence

by Jaime on May 27, 2011

Getting all of these denim shorts in my mailbox is reminding me about summer – and about one specific aspect of summer that is never, EVER easy for me to deal with:

Showing some skin.

I don’t think that, for anyone really, it’s a size issue (at least, it’s not primarily a size issue). For me, it’s just discomfort. It’s fear. And it’s pure insecurity.

And it’s… stupid.

Ever feel the same way? Whether you’re concerned about being age-appropriate, covering up, hiding your weight (or lack thereof) or any other myriad options, I wanted to share these three primary thoughts – since they’re not really tips or a how-to – on your summer wardrobe and the feelings along with that.

1. Wear what you love. Whether that’s jeans, sweatpants or cocktail dresses, from blue to blonde hair. You get to make the call, and anyone who tells you otherwise (once, you know, you’re over 18 and/or not living under your parents’ roof. Just for safe keeping) is full of shit.

2. Be comfortable – in your jeans/clothes/underwear/pasties and in your skin. It doesn’t matter what you wear – if you don’t feel good with your fit OR yourself, you’ll never have a chance to focus on you. Clothing, makeup, hair, etc… it’s all a part of complimenting who YOU are, not the other way around.

3. Don’t listen to the critics. I can just stop this at two words: “Fuck ‘em.” But, you know what? Critics are there – especially the negative or slanderous ones – to strengthen you. Thank them for being so concerned about who you are instead developing their own self-worth, then let it roll off your shoulders. But, you know what? YOU are your own worst critic. So stop listening to the shitty things you’re telling yourself. STOP. You’re better than that.

I guess I become a little bit of a dissident even within positive body image circles because I am not a part of the body movement. I’m not interested in fat love or thin love – or even mid-sized love. I don’t want to hear about size as a qualifier for love EVER.

I’m interested in ME love.

And you should be, too. After all, not one of us was born with the hatred we have – let’s not keep making it consume our lives.

Some posts I’d recommend you check out? “Popping My Self-Acceptance Bubble“, “Lessons in Self-Love” and my own post, “Why is Body Acceptance so Important?” are all good. If you have others, please share.

Love,
JP

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Ellie Di May 27, 2011 at 11:37 am

“After all, not one of us was born with the hatred we have.” Hellz to the Yes! It’s such a hard thing to (un)learn for a lot of us, though. I didn’t start having body image and clothes issues until I hit college, and it took me YEARS to get to the point where I’ll wear shorts or a bathing suit in public again (about seven, to be more precise). I had to constantly remind myself that there’s nothing wrong with me or my body. That even if I’m 400 pounds in Daisy Dukes, and I’m comfortable and happy, then who gives a shit what anyone else thinks? It’s been a hard road, but I’m glad I’ve been making the journey (it’s by no means done).

Much love to you and to all the folks out there who’re walking on the path to self-confidence. You can do it!
Ellie Di recently posted..Popping My Body-Acceptance BubbleMy Profile

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CanCan May 28, 2011 at 1:58 am

Beautifully put! It takes all shapes and sizes!
CanCan recently posted..Preschool Summer Camps at KinderCareMy Profile

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